Preparation Anxiety

I know It's been a while since I last posted, but I really do want to use this space as a journal of my first year of teaching. I want to remember some of my experiences and ideas... and maybe I'll even have some good ideas to share!

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Before school started, I was wondered if I was really ready. How well had my college classes and student teaching prepared me for my own classroom?

Looking back, I thank God for all of those classes that I took (I've used lots of what I learned on a regular basis), but I've learned that no amount of classes can ever prepare you for actual teaching.

• Where was the class on how to deal with parents?
• Where was the class on how to manage a grade book? How to handle grading all the papers? How to keep track of and deal with missing assignments? (None of my cooperating teachers talked about this with me.)
• When did they cover how to deal with constant tattling? 
• Where was the lesson how how to deal with triplets in your classroom?
• What is the best seating arrangement to minimize chatting? I haven't found it!
• Where do I sit the kid that no one wants to sit by?
• What do I do with the little diva who constantly stirs up trouble? Mom thinks she's an angel...
• Where was the class on how to organize your teaching resources?
• For our classes, we were taught to plan one unit for one subject at a time, but where was the class on the logistics of planning for every subject for an entire week?
• When will I be able to stop spending my weekends lesson planning? When will I be able to use my preps efficiently?
• What am I supposed to do when I don't have enough textbooks for each student in my class? When the school in general is seriously lacking resources? Resources that I have been taught to use and rely on? (We don't even have a set of children's dictionaries in the school... or a computer lab or other technology resources that can really enhance teaching and learning... but I guess my elementary teachers didn't have that technology "back in the day" either, and somehow I learned something.) 

Some of these things you simply could never be taught; you have to learn them and figure them out on your own. I found the answers to many of these questions (sometimes the hard way) within the first month or so of school.  I finally found a system I like for tracking missing work, and for making sure parents are aware of it immediately. I'm still trying to figure out how to deal with a few nightmare parents (like the one who invited herself to yesterday's Halloween party). I'll do the best I can with the resources I do have. I'll keep moving seats until I find the magic combination. The triplets are getting better. I still have to do my lesson planning at home, but as I'm becoming more familiar with the texts, it is getting easier. I still struggle to keep up on grading papers but that's getting better, too... but how the heck do you grade handwriting???

I'm finally starting to feel a little more confident in my abilities as a teacher. While classroom management is not 100% where I want it to be, that's improving by leaps and bounds as well. They are starting to take me seriously. I've upped my expectations, and they're starting to get that I mean business. For example, they used to think that they had all morning to complete simple tasks like handwriting, but I've kept track of the students who are consistently the last ones finished (mainly because of chatting and lack of focus) and, quite frankly, I nag them. I've moved their seats near each other and I stand *rightby* them when we do class work so I can keep them on task. You know what? They whine at me a little bit, but the work is getting done at an acceptable pace!

I Think I'll start ending each post with a "Teacher Tip." These will just be little tips and ideas that I've found have worked in my classroom, so they might work for others.

TEACHER TIP #1:
Here's an idea for keeping track of missing assignments: I was struggling with keeping track of missing assignments, but didn't feel right giving students a zero without giving them one more chance or, even more importantly, without letting the parents know that the work was missing. Every morning I check in homework with a class list I made in Word using the "table" feature. I can immediately see who is missing the assignment (as opposed to finding out at the end of the day when going through my "hand in" basket), and handle it right away. I keep this list on a clipboard, along with a few extra copies of the assignment. Also on my clipboard are my "Oops! I forgot to turn in my homework!" notes. These are little notes that I copy onto brightly colored paper and then cut apart (I get three per page). The note, which gets attached to the missing assignment and requires a parent signature, warns that the student will get a zero if the work isn't completed and turned in. If the student still has the assignment, I attach the note to their copy, but if they're lost it, I have those extra copies right on the clipboard! This way, I'm covered because I gave the student another chance AND I let the parents know! If the work doesn't come back, at least I'm covered if I have to give a zero.

7 out of 10 ain't bad!

That's where we've made it to! Today is the first day I haven't come home completely beat. Behavior-wise, I'd give the 4th graders a 7 out of 10 for today.

Considering where we've come from, this is awesome!

I didn't want to be the mean teacher. I wanted them to like me. Maybe too much. I have learned (the hard way) that you can't do that. It's better to start "mean," then loosen up on them a bit sometime later down the road.

Last Friday I'd had it. I found out that morning that I would be having 2 preps that day. Music first thing, and Spanish they-didn't-know-when (at some point I may also have art on Friday, too... crazy). We get our "specials" teachers from another district, so we kind of have to take them when they tell us they can come.... once the schedule is set, it will be consistent... it just looks like they're all on one day.

... Anyway, I was flustered, the principal was flustered...

So, here it is first thing in the morning and I find out I have music right out of the gate. No problem, except for we serve breakfast in the room every morning (just granola bars and juice and stuff). I talked to the principal and we decided I should hold off on breakfast until after music. So, I set the breakfast tray on the seat of my chair and slid my chair under my desk. I slid. My chair. Under. My desk. I turn around for 42 seconds to adjust the schedule for the day on the board to reflect the specials, then turn back around to see kids with juice cups and mouths full of granola. One student had taken it upon himself to serve breakfast and put the tray in its usual spot.

I freaked out a little bit.

I decided that was it. When they returned from music, I pulled out the packet that I had given to their parents at the open house the night before and told the students what I told their parents:

• From now on you will get ONE verbal warning.
• After that your name is on the board. 
• If you get a check next to your name, you have to fill out a "behavior improvement plan" which you will sign, I will sign, and a parent will sign. (What rule did you break? What should you have done instead? What will you do next time?)

And then I broke out the reward system.

• If I "catch" you doing what you're supposed to be doing, on task, listening, staying in your seat, etc., you'll get one of these tickets. You can redeem the tickets for prizes each Friday (or save them up for bigger prizes).

Ok, I don't like to bribe kids, but they work hard for these tickets (I'm pretty stingy with them, in my opinion) and they love the idea.

We have silent reading every afternoon after recess. Until now, it was a vain attempt to mellow them out. Today, they were silent. The whole 20 minutes. Two students even came up to me after and commented how nice the quiet was. If those two appreciated it, I'm sure others did, too. I was proud of them. They were proud of themselves. I was happy instead of frustrated, and because of it, we had a totally decent afternoon. It was exactly the dynamic I wanted ... but I'm still in "mean" mode.

I've also started demanding silence before we will begin class. This has helped tremendously with transitions between subjects and students talking while I'm teaching. It sometimes seems like I'm wasting a lot of time waiting right now, but it really is working! I'm sure it will come more naturally to them down the road.

I also switched the schedule around a bit. Remember I was complaining that they were so good in the morning, but terrors in the afternoon? Well, I moved math to the morning and reading to the afternoon. They all finish math at different rates, and those early-finishers are far less rambunctious in the morning (they also don't seem to finish as quickly... maybe they're still sleepy). I seem to be able to fill the reading time slot better with my planning, and reading seems to mellow them out, so we moved that to the afternoon.

Progress. We're making progress. I love it!

Oh yeah... and I finally got another teacher there to admit that her class isn't where she'd like it to be behavior-wise either... actually, I happen to know she's having some pretty big problems... and she's a veteran! Made me feel like much less of a failure!

Going Four-ward...

Today was the fourth full day of school. It went.... ok. Could have been better, but wasn't horrible.

But! I realized something today regarding classroom management. A little breakthrough that may have made me feel better. As you know, classroom management is the area of teaching with which I was most concerned. It is the area where I think I am (and many other first year teachers are) most lacking. You really have to find your own style of management, and you can only do that to a certain extent while student teaching and subbing. Finding your style and finding what works will take time. Today I realized that maybe I've set unrealistic expectations of myself. Maybe I've set unrealistic expectations of my students. Today I realized that maybe the fact that there are so many different classroom management techniques and plans, and volume after volume after volume published about classroom management, means that a "perfect" classroom is non-existent. No one else can figure out the perfect plan either, so they keep studying it and writing the next great management book. Maybe I'm letting that one boy who gets up without permission upset me too much, or I'm letting the one little side conversation that's happening while I'm teaching irritate me more than it should. Now, before I have everyone freaking out thinking I'm going to let these things happen in my classroom, rest assured I'm not. I will tell the boy to go back to his seat and finish his work (or give him another assignment). I will move closer to the students having the conversation and give them the famous "teacher look." What I need to STOP doing is taking it so personally. I see these things as such a huge negative reflection on my teaching. But is it realistic of me to expect these little things to never happen? Do I need to lighten up on myself a little? I mean, it's not like I have all 21 students up and climbing the bookshelves. It's just the same few students over and over for the same "violations." I guess since its such a new job and since I filled the position of a teacher whose contract wasn't renewed, I'm worried about my performance and if it's good enough. As a result, I think I'm putting too much pressure on myself to create perfection... and I don't know if one 33 year old and twenty one 9 and 10 year olds are capable of perfection. I think I need to relax and go with the flow a little more. Maybe the management part will start to come more naturally.

At lunch time I asked some of the other teachers how there classes were doing behavior-wise. They all made it sound like it's all sunshine and rainbows in their classrooms. I asked the 5th grade teacher (because that's the group I subbed for when they were in 4th grade last year) how that group was, knowing full well that some of them had to be trouble. She made it sound like everything was perfect. So I asked her about her discipline plan. She does the good old name-on-the-board technique. As she's explaining this, she motioned to the board --- there must have been 15 names up there! She has 21 kids, just like I do. Maybe, then, she's not any better at this than I am???

I hate to make it sound like the students are bad because they aren't! Really they aren't! It's just that classroom management is an interesting challenge to me and I'm fascinated as to how other teachers go about it. I have no problem acknowledging that it's a challenge, while many of my colleagues don't seem to want to admit that they may be struggling a little (15 names on the board?!?). But maybe I can get away with admitting it because I'm just a newbee.... perhaps they figure they've been doing this longer and should know what they're doing by now. Who knows?

And can I just mention that I hate that we start before Labor Day? That short week was not very productive. Since it was followed by a 4 day weekend, which was like summer vacation all over again, I practically had to start over and review things we did last week.

What a week!

Wow! All I can say is.... I am E X H A U S T E D!

On Wednesday, I dragged myself home from school, pulled into my driveway, and realized I had nothing for dinner. So, I turned around and headed down the street to the fancy local European Market. I hobbled through the parking lot on aching feet, past all of the beautiful, exotic, fresh produce... past the TVs tuned into Giada on the Food Network, who I'm sure was preparing something spectacular for her supper... I found the small freezer case at the back of the store where I grabbed a box of frozen chicken nuggets and a bag of frozen peas. On my way to the register and grabbed a package of prepared rice pilaf. Dinner. That was all I could muster.

So, where to start...? Well, I guess I'll start with the weather. This past week would have to be the hottest of the summer. Over 90 each day. And I'm stuck on the second floor of an old building in a stinky big city with no air conditioning in a room with twenty-one 9 and 10 year olds. Can you spell "miserable"? To say it's hot would be an understatement. The room has a ceiling fan, and the principal gave me two loud old box fans. These do not help. I've had to shower again every day after getting home. Next week is supposed to be about 10 degrees cooler. I hope we feel that difference upstairs.

My feet are swollen. They are killing me. After the second day I had to drag myself shoe shopping because everything I owned was too uncomfortable. I needed flats. I bought 4 new pairs of shoes. I wore a different pair of my new flats each of the past two days. My feet are still swollen and now I have blisters on my heels (which the students noticed and were very concerned about... "Mrs. W. Your heels are bleeding! Do you want me to go to the office and get you a band-aid?")

I've lost my voice. Teaching requires a lot more talking than my poor vocal chords are used to. And those loud fans I mentioned? I have to talk even louder to be heard over them. You can actually hear all the fans in the upstairs classrooms buzzing from the bottom of the stairwell. 

The days are long. 8:00-3:15. That's difficult to plan for when you have no specials (Art, Music, etc.). I guess those are supposed to start next week, which will be a big help. The only thing I could think of to do was teach one subject twice to fill the time because 8:00-3:15 is way more than enough time to spend 45 minutes each on reading, writing, English, religion, math, science and social studies. Even when I planned for all this and factored in lunch, I was still left with about an hour each day that I didn't know what to do with.... so we did math again! Actually, to be honest, I completely underplanned the week! I didn't plan for social studies at all, thinking I wouldn't need to, and then when I did a minute by minute schedule, I realized I had too much time left over (which is super dangerous), so I had to manifest a social studies lesson out of thin air. I scoured the classroom library and found two pictures books about young girls coming to America through Ellis Island. Perfect. The Plan: Read and discuss the first story on day one. Read the second story on day two, then have them write or draw what they would pack in their suitcase if they were going to leave their country and family forever like the girls in the stories. Not bad, I thought... but I still had one more day to plan for. Then I remembered Labor Day. Perfect again. Google to the rescue. I went to school armed with stories and activities about St. Joseph (the patron saint of workers) and Henry Ford (who was an innovator in the world of labor and was known for being very good to his workers). I managed to FILL the day!

The students are awesome. They are all beautiful and adorable and funny! For the most part, their behavior has been OK. I think it will get better because it is only the first week of school... and it was only a 3.5 day week at that. They haven't had much of a chance to settle into a routine. They are pretty close to perfect in the morning, but, for some reason, they are not so perfect in the afternoon. I don't know if it's a post-recess thing, or the heat, or what. Every day I've come home a little discouraged thinking its me, but then the next morning they'll be great again, so I don't know what the deal is. One afternoon while they were working on the suitcase project for my made-up social studies lesson, they all just started singing. Together. It was adorable. It was a current, popular hip-hop song that I hear all the time, but right now I can't remember which one it was. It made me smile... but then I remembered there were other teachers down the hall so maybe I should stop them. A cute moment nonetheless.

Despite the heat and the horrible swollen feet, I think I'll go back on Tuesday!

First Day

Tomorrow starts the first day of school and I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be! My current class list is now at 20, which is good because I have the room set for exactly 20 students. Any more show up and I'll have to rearrange a bit, but I already have a plan in mind for accomplishing that with minimum disruption if that happens. I still have to post pictures of the room!

I have to admit, despite being nervous, I'm pretty excited! I can't wait to put a little face to each name on the list.

I created lesson plans for our short, 3.5 day week (tomorrow is only a half day). That was a challenge, because I didn't really want to start too much content with only a three day week (plus the principal told me that no matter what, some students won't show up until after Labor Day anyway). We have a long weekend because of the holiday, and then next week is a 4 day week. Some of my "routines" I won't be able to start until our first full week because they are dependent on 5-day weeks.

I don't find lesson planning difficult, in general, but I must say, being handed a "blank slate" kind of threw me off. When I was student teaching, I picked up where my cooperating teacher left off, and she kind of told me where to go next. This time, I had to start from scratch. I know that when I was in school, teachers didn't always start with chapter one... they often jumped all over the place. Well, maybe I'll come up with a different plan for next year, but for now, I pretty much picked up the teacher manuals for each subject and started with some of the activities suggested in the "back to school" section, or just started with good old chapter 1.

I printed out copies of our state standards for 4th grade so that I can keep track of which standards I'm covering with each lesson (I intend to write the code for each standard covered next to the lessons in my plan book -- can't hurt to cover my butt a little). The standards are housed in a big, neon green binder that I will keep handy so that I can make notes, keep copies of my better lesson plans, keep copies of good resources I find, and so on. This binder will serve as my "Bible" for next year. Based on watching the other teachers prepare for the beginning of the year, I have a feeling lesson planning will go much more smoothly my second year, and continue to become even easier after that.

To start the year, we (the teachers and principal) attended a little retreat this past Thursday at a popular Catholic site in the city. We had a mass there with our Pastor from school and just the 10 or so of us. It was lovely and very inspiring. It really made me feel like I'm off to a good start.

Anyhow, I'm excited for tomorrow and not sure how well I'll be able to sleep tonight!

You're on my list...

I got my class list yesterday! Currently, I have 16 fourth graders registered. Only 4 of them are boys. There are four more students (three of them are triplets!) who they suspect will register by Monday when school starts, which would take my grand total to 20 with 7 boys.

I'll admit, since it is my first year teaching, I don't mind that I have so few boys. I think I have to work my way up to their energy level! I say this knowing full well I may eat those words (imagining how dramatic pre-teen girls can be). I did have to deal with some girl drama while student teaching.

I really hope my numbers don't creep above 20. I had 28 in my student teaching class and that was a lot. Eight fewer kids will make a big difference. I actually hope it stays closer to 16, but I've been told by the principal and pretty much all the teachers there that enrollment seems to fluctuate up and down until October.

Anyhow, I proudly displayed all their names on my "Welcome" bulletin board. As I wrote each name on the cute little paper apple that coordinates with the border around the board, I wondered how long it will take for me to develop that seemingly "perfect" teacher handwriting....

More meetings and a retreat today, then finishing decorations and lesson planning tomorrow... then I meet the students on Monday! Can't wait!

The struggle continues...

Well, I'm still struggling with "perfecting" my discipline plan. Your comments were all very helpful and gave me lots to think about... but now they really have me second guessing myself! There are so many aspects of teaching that you can only learn through experience! So much they don't -- and quite frankly can't -- teach you in your education classes...

We had one "classroom management" class that focused very much on poverty and how/why poverty can affect behavior. We were all very disappointed with the class when it was said and done. I guess we wanted someone to just hand us the perfect discipline plan (This is all you have to do... works like a charm every time!) and be done with it. The best education we received about classroom management was observing experienced teachers during our multiple field placements and student teaching placements. In my case, all three of the classrooms/teachers I observed used a system similar to what I described in my previous post -- sort of a gradient system with graduated consequences for additional violations. Unfortunately, it's what I know. I have seen it work, but I know it's not ideal or perfect.


I attended the very first day of school when I began my student teaching with high hopes of seeing stellar classroom management at work. I wanted to see how a teacher "laid down the law." Funny thing, though, my cooperating teacher never mentioned a single rule to the class that day. Not the second day either. Or the third. Or ever. (Not in my presence, anyway -- and that first week I was there every day). She just displayed the ever popular "traffic light" prominently on an easel in the front of the room and started using it. At least I'm trying to do better by the kids in my class than that. I've seen a lot of what doesn't work, but I'm still struggling to find what does. At least I plan to actually have rules instead of making the students guess what they are. I plan to discuss them and go over examples of what following and/or breaking these rules look like. What I'm struggling with is how many chances to give and the consequences for breaking rules.

I have scoured the internet and I've purchased three different books in hopes of finding the perfect discipline plan. All this has served to do is confuse me more! There are so many different theories out there about what works and what doesn't. One article or book will completely contradict another -- but both will make very valid points! Several of the plans I've encountered seem completely idealized to me -- I just don't think that children reason or think in the manner that some of these experts suggest, but... Anyway, the truth is, I don't think there is one set plan that will work for every student in every class in every school. This must be why some of these books I've read have been sort of vague. "You have to establish rules on the first day." No problem. What should they be? "Breaking the rules must have consequences." I agree... like what?

Practice makes perfect, they say, and I think this is one of those things I'm just going to have to practice. I'll have to adjust and improve as I go. I'm hope this post doesn't sound like I'm panicking and worried, because I'm really not. I'm just trying to sort through some recent information overload. I've read everything from "Post your consequences where the students can see them" to "Don't mention consequences until a rule is broken." "Involve students in making the class rules" to "Don't ever involve students in making the class rules." One article says a certain consequence is "degrading," the next will say it's "empowering." Lots of advice to consider, lots of pros and cons to weight -- but ultimately all I can do is just put something into "practice," hope for the best, and tweak as I go. No one can say I didn't do my research and no one can say I'm not trying. I really and truly am concerned about the well being of my students and want to do the best for them to create a happy, healthy and safe classroom for everyone. I hope that they pick up on that vibe and likewise don't want to disappoint me. I'm excited to see how the first week goes and how things will ultimately work out.

Am I Off Target?

Ok, I could use your thoughts/advice/expertise on my teaching challenge du jour. I've been thinking long and hard about my classroom discipline plan and I think I've come up with one that's mostly good, but while laying in bed last night obsessing thinking about it, I started to second guess a part of it.

My idea is loosely based on the traffic light idea, where students who misbehave gradually move their name from green, to yellow (warning), to red (consequence), with a big consequence for any more "violations" after that. Well, I was thinking of doing something similar, but employing a "target" with three rings, and putting all of the students' names on arrows. Everyone will start the day on the bullseye, and move their name to an outer ring if necessary. My plan was this: Red bullseye means you're doing fine; middle white ring is a warning; outer red ring will be a consequence (I was thinking they'll have to write out a plan for improving behavior in the future or preventing the problem from happening again). Then this is where I start to take issue. My plan for a class incentive each week was going to be 30 minutes of Friday Free Time (got this idea from my classmate who student taught across the hall from me). The class starts the week with a full 30 minutes, but can lose minutes (which can not be earned back) for not coming together when called, getting too loud, etc. Well, what I was thinking of doing was having the next level of consequence when you're completely "off target" be that you lose a minute of free time for the whole class (beyond that your parents would be notified or you'll make a trip to the office or something like that). Initially, I was thinking that this would, over time, help the students regulate each other as a class. But now I'm wondering if this would turn the whole class against a student who lost their minute and cause a divide. But again, that may be what some students need to keep themselves in line. I researched a ton of discipline times online and in books, but didn't really see any where eventually an individual student's behavior affected the whole class in this manner... however, I've seen teachers do this and believe it happened in many of my classes when I was in elementary school. My student teaching cooperating teacher employed a marble jar as a class incentive (once they earned all their marbles they got some kind of reward), and individual students could lose class marbles for their behavior when substitutes were there or for behavior during "specials" like art, gym, etc.

Any thoughts on this plan? I don't know how many people read this yet, but I'd really appreciate your input!

Welcome!

Welcome to The Elementary Experience! I'm Mrs. W and  I've started this blog to chronicle my very first year as a teacher.

In may of 2010 I received my teaching certificate from the state. In July of 2010 I had an interview for a 4th grade position at a small, inner-city, Catholic school. I was offered -- and I accepted -- the position, and school starts with students at the end of August!

Shortly after I accepted the position, the nerves set in. Slowly but surely, the realization of what a huge responsibility I now have began to dawn on me. I don't want to let these children or their families down. I don't want to let my principal or the school down. Heck, I don't want to let myself down!

Yes, I'm nervous, it's true -- but I'm also very excited! I spent Monday of this week organizing my classroom (I love the way that sounds -- "my classroom") but barely made a dent, so I'm headed back to school today to see what additional progress I can make. Text books and teachers manuals are organized, desks are cleaned and arranged, the general floor plan is there, but I still have a ton of organizing to do -- not to mention decorating and finalizing all of my procedures and rules!

I hope you'll stay tuned to see how my year progresses. My plan is to post the good, the bad, and the ugly. I'm sure I'll have a few brilliant ideas and revelations to share, but I'm also sure I'll make my fair share of rookie mistakes and I plan to keep a record of those, as well. It should be an exciting ride!

Thanks for stopping by!

Mrs. W